SNARK WEEK: Mylène Farmer Does 18th Century (NSFW)

24

Support Frock Flicks with a small donation! During Snark Week and beyond, we’re grateful for your small, one-time contributions via PayPal or monthly pledges for exclusive content via Patreon to offset the costs of running this site. You can even buy our T-shirts and swag. Think of this like supporting public broadcasting, but with tons of swearing and no tax deductions!

 

If you’re not French, this post is going to seem totally random, but I need you to trust me for a moment when I tell you that 1. There is a French pop star named Mylène Farmer, and 2. In the 1980s she made two LONG music videos inspired by the film Barry Lyndon, and 3. Said videos are possibly the ultimate expression of New Romantic Does 18th Century. Move over Adam Ant!

Beaver Warning: this post is NSFW!

To give you just a whiff of what I’m talking about:

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Now, let’s get to it:

 

Libertine

Libertine (1986) starts with Mylène dueling with a guy with RIDICULOUS sideburns, while some lady looks on:

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Okay, so we’ve got a nylon lace bib, leather waistcoat with metal grommets, and THAT MAKEUP AND HAIR.

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

He’s every goth’s wet dream!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

I am NOT KIDDING about those sideburns!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Admit it, we all want to be this!

Mylène kills Sideburns, giving Other Lady a sad. Random cut to an ozone-depleting party scene:

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

This hair is FUCKING EPIC

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

And another random cut to Softcore Porn Ladies Giggling in the Bath With Full Beaver!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Historically accurate pubes! Note the wigs on the stands…

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

SUCH FUN

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Wait except Aunt Biddy is displeased

And now we’re back to the party! Mylène is gambling, but receives a note from Mr. Sensitive Goth:

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Mylène’s hair is tame by comparison.

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

HE FEELS ALL THE FEELS, Y’ALL

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

In case you were worried, Mylène’s eyeshadow blending game is On Point

But wait, who’s that lurking the background?

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

No one can resist such sensitive, fluffy hair!

Mylène and Mr. Sensitive get it ON:

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Mylène is NOT SHY about her historically accurate pubes!

Mylène then heads back to the party, but…

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Ballin’

“You’ve already taken one Goth Dreamboat from me!”

Cue MASSIVE BITCH FIGHT!!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Back lacing!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

They are NOT MESSING AROUND with this fight scene!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Other Lady appears to be wearing some kind of rump!

Mr. Sensitive rescues Mylène! Other Lady is pissed!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

Weave gets snatched!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

And apparently Other Lady didn’t have anything to anchor her wig to in terms of her own hair, so what was she expecting?

But wait! Other Lady has backup!

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

I guess there’s just one road in and out of town?

1986 Mylene Farmer - Libertine

It’s hard out here for a pimp!

 

Pourvu Qu’elles Soient Douces

Two years later, Mylène came out with a sequel that’s even MORE Barry Lyndon, and whose plot makes even LESS sense!

The British army finds Mylène and Mr. Sensitive, but discovers Mylène is alive! Some BDSM Soldier takes her back to his tent and acts like he’s about to whip her:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Luckily Mylène’s makeup survived!

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

BDSM Soldier feels that there’s not enough BDSM happening.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Deciding to do something about that!

He catches a little boy soldier spying on them, so takes him out for a formal whipping:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

BDSM Soldier is happy so long as he gets to whip SOMEBODY

Mylène shows up and acts like she’s going to take over the whipping, but instead whips BDSM soldier:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Don’t F with Mylène!

BDSM soldier makes Mylène change into a soldier’s uniform while he watches laciviously:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

She’s clearly upset.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Mylène escapes by smashing BDSM Soldier in the face with a wine bottle, but he catches her, discovers she’s wounded her hand, and tenderly carries her back to camp.

Meanwhile Other Lady from Libertine shows up with a whole bunch of questionably attired ladies and bribes the soldiers:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Other Lady is big on the honkin’ pearls.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

GOD I wish I could get better screenshots!

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

You know there’s all kind of hilarity in there!

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Like this, inappropriately-split-in-back skirt…

BDSM soldier takes a wounded Mylène back to his camp, where they tenderly (barf) make love:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Wait, I thought he was a rapist and child abuser? Huh?

While the Questionably Attired Ladies get it on with the soldiers:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces 1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

The next morning, the Questionably Attired Ladies signal the French troops, and a battle ensues:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

In case you were worried this video didn’t have any beaver shots.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

No chemises were harmed in the making of this film.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Tits out; don’t care!

But Other Lady spots Mylène, and Bitch Fight II: Electric Boogaloo is ON:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

A behind the scenes shot of her clunky pearls.

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Once again, punches are NOT pulled!

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Bitches flip each other over!

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

They end up in a muddy creek, where Mylène bayonets Other Lady!

The battle continues, until Mylène — who has found a black chemise dress?? — rides out to nobly save young soldier boy:

1988 Mylene Farmer - Pourvu qu'elles soient douces

Where did this come from?

And now you should know that the costumes for these masterpieces were designed by Carine Sarfati, who designed the women’s costumes for Valmont!

 

 

Keep the snark rollin' all year long - click to support FrockFlicks.com

Tags

About the author

Kendra

Website

Kendra has been a fixture in the online costuming world since the late 1990s. Her website, Démodé Couture, is one of the most well-known online resources for historical costumers. In the summer of 2014, she published a book on 18th-century wig and hair styling. Kendra is a librarian at a university, specializing in history and fashion. She’s also an academic, with several articles on fashion history published in research journals.

24 Responses

  1. Susan Pola Staples

    I’m amazed and know not what….
    Forget Adam Ant, what about Bowie in Labyrinth?

    Reply
  2. Lin

    So the French can just put full frontal nudity in music videos? Incredible.

    Can I also just say thank you for these posts. I love snark week every year in general and I love especially any posts about bizarre 18th century themed 1980’s music videos.

    Reply
  3. Nee

    French here ! Those clips are famous – when I was a kid I had a VHS of those. Also 100% kinky. The second song translates as “As long as they are soft” and is fully about having sex, just using a different kind of orifice that is not on the front ;). I don’t think this would be allowed today !

    Reply
  4. Kathleen Julie Norvell

    I could just imagine Alan Cumming (in full Plunkett & Macleane kit) in the first one. It looks like for the second, they rented the uniforms from Barry Lyndon. While I’ve certainly seen better costumes, Ghod knows I’ve seen worse! Truly silly videos, but a fun waste of time.

    Reply
  5. The History Editor

    OH MY GOD what a perfect ending to Snark Week. You all always knock it out of the park.

    Reply
  6. Stella

    Omg, thank you so much for posting this! My high school best friend is a huge francophile and showed me Mylène’s videos back then (although she advised me against watching these, lol) and we had so much fun watching all the rather bizarre stuff in those clips! I love Libertine for being all the ‘debauched French aristocrats’-tropes rolled into one video combined with a sick synthesizer beat…absolutely amazing artistry :’D

    Reply
  7. Debbie Farthing

    I literally laughed out loud and nearly spit out my wine! Giggling in the tub with full beaver may be new favorite phrase.
    I am going to have to look up this video now.
    Thank you for all the laughs!

    Reply
  8. Boxermom

    Thank God I’m not at work, because I’m cackling hysterically. Maybe you should do a post about “Historically Accurate Pubes.”

    Reply
    • M.E. Lawrence

      And historically accurate underarm/axilla hair; historically accurate non-head hair in general, including eyebrows. (21st-century eyebrows on non-21st-century people bother me no end.)

      Reply
  9. Mxtress Valleycat

    How did I not know these existed until now? Nonsensical plot, big dresses, androgyny and historically accurate bush are absolutely my jam!

    Reply
  10. Marie McGowan Irving

    In France, whipping for sexual gratification used to be called ‘the English vice’ and I suspect the whipping thing is an allusion to this but aside from that, well, I got nothing.

    Reply
  11. picasso Manu

    Oh, goodness, my twenties are back from the (long) dead!
    And yes, we French have beavers and are not afraid to show it!

    Or, well, we used to… sometimes I think pubes and hairpins eloped together Goddess knows where.
    I miss Mylene a bit, she was so wonderfully weird.

    Reply
  12. SarahV

    I sit here stunned that I never knew these were a thing!!! I feel like my life has been but an empty shell until this moment.

    Also “Giggling in the tub with full beaver” will totally be the title of my memoirs.

    Reply

Feel the love

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.