SNARK WEEK: Comments That Chap My Hide, Part 2

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Frock Flicks is like my vanity press where I get to write whatever the fuck I want, and I generally love the shit out of doing it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t still be doing it, publishing five times a week after five years straight! But sometimes … sometimes we get comments that really irritate me. Last Snark Week, I categorized a few of them, but I missed some gems that deserve a follow-up. To wit…

 

People Who Don’t Like Swearing

When I see a comment like “you should realize just HOW distracting all your cursing is in this article,” I know that Frock Flicks is CLEARLY not for that person. Please head over to the New York Times or somewhere tidy and safe like Disney.com! That’s not who we are. Bitchy is our brand for a reason.

Kate McKinnon - Elizabeth Warren - This ain't for you

 

 

How Dare You Have a Patreon, Part 2, Electric Bugaloo!

Yes, I run this site out of the goodness of my little black heart, so 98% of the content is FREE!!!!!!!!! Just search around, I’m not going to add up how many hundreds of articles are available to each and every one of you to read and discuss and comment on.

Because when someone says “It seems like everything is behind a patreon firewall after a teaser post that gets me to click over to the site,” they are dead fucking wrong! We post a Patreon article once a month, at most. I actually feel bad that our Patreon subscribers don’t get MORE content for their money!!!

Downton Abbey - oh good let's talk about money

Patreon subscribers are the best!!! Patreon subscribers keep me, Kendra, and Sarah from having to spend a shitton of money in addition to the shitton of time we already spend on this ridiculous hobby of Frock Flicks. We owe Patreon subscribers two or three articles a month, but it’s fucktards that whine about it, plus my own guilt about wanting to give Patreon subscribers only really really high-quality articles that stops me.

You Deserve Something Amazing

At some point, maybe I will just put random articles behind the Patreon paywall, so those fuckers will have something legit to bitch about.

 

The Super Random Off-Topic Comments

Say we have a post about a particular movie. Lots of comments come in about that movie — the costumes, the actors, the historical period. Cool. Then someone comments, “hey, what do you think about the costumes in this totally unrelated TV show?”

Addams Family

I get it, you want to talk about your thing. But try talking about it in the right venue. First, search the site and see if we have an article about your thing. Then post there.

Better yet, wait till the first Friday of the month. That’s when we have the Free-for-All open thread on the blog. Everyone is free to talk about whatever you want that’s tangentially related to history, costume, movies, or TV shows.

Tom Hiddleston - Friday I'm In Love

 

Related: Emails With No Context!

If you’re going to email us, please, for the love of natural fibers, please tell us what you’re talking about! We’ve actually received more than one email where the entire content was like this:

“What kind of clothing are these women wearing? What fabric is that and where can I buy such dresses. It’s very beautiful, you talk about the costume designer but fail to talk about the whole clothing.”

No picture included, no URL, no movie/TV name mentioned. Not only do we not enjoy doing your homework, we can’t read your mind to do it!

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - what?

 

Where Can I Watch That Frock Flick?

Perhaps the most frequently asked question in comments and on social media is “where can I watch that movie or TV show?” Folks, we DO have this in our FAQ! In the top nav of the blog, click “About” then “Frock Flicks FAQ,” and it’s the third question. Let me recap:

There are online tools you can use to see if a movie/TV show is available for streaming. You can buy a DVD/Blu-ray, even VHS, and libraries also have them. You can watch movies in theaters or on live TV, cable TV, on-demand, or YouTube.

Tim Gunn - Can I be honest here?

What we can’t do is identify exactly where a specific frock flick is available for you because we don’t know where you live and what services you have available! For example, I can watch something on Netflix one month and post the review the following month. But maybe the show isn’t available on Netflix where you reside in Australia for two more months or at all. Or you don’t have Netflix! How can I know any of this? You gotta figure these things out for yourself, folks.

I thought Google eliminated the need to ask questions out loud, but fine.

 

 

What burning question do you have that will annoy me next?

 

 

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About the author

Trystan L. Bass

Twitter Website

A self-described ElderGoth, Trystan has been haunting the internet since the early 1990s. Always passionate about costume, from everyday office wear to outrageous twisted historical creations, she has maintained some of the earliest online costuming-focused resources on the web. Her costuming adventures are chronicled on her website, TrystanCraft. She also ran a popular fashion blog, This Is CorpGoth, dedicated to her “office drag.”

33 Responses

  1. Jennifer Faith

    Preach it, sister!

    Question though, and I Hope this one doesn’t annoy you too much, but I’m interested in knowing the exact scientific measurement of a shitton. Is it greater than or equal to a shitload? Or is it more akin to a fuckton? None of the unit converter apps has the information and it seems like something a seamstress should know. I’d hate to buy too little of something, ya know? :)-

    Reply
    • Trystan L. Bass

      Oh a shitload is smallest, then it’s a shitton, which is less than a fuckton. But note that there’s also metric fuckton — us Americans don’t know how to measure that tho ;)

      Reply
      • nesseire

        In metric it would be measured in nanoshit (nSt), microshit (µSt), milishit (mSt), shit (St), kiloshit (KSt), megashit (MSt) etc… considering the basic measure (Shit=St) is all the bullcrap that can be put inside a cubic metre. Not to be confused with the measurement of Fucks (Fk) ;)

        Reply
  2. Nzie

    My favorite is that every now and then someone clearly is googling a much-loved show and doesn’t realize (somehow?) the entire point of this blog is to review the costumes, and gets annoyed that you’re a) only discussing the costumes and b) think they have problems, as if you should love the show like they do (matter of taste) and give costume problems a pass because it’s just such a wonderful story (even though it’s a historic costume review blog).

    I don’t mind some swearing but it’s the Internet—it’s not like I paid a ticket with some expectations that it was a family show. If it’s too much or I disagree, I just move on. Like an adult. Because I am one.

    Love all your work. Hope to be a patreon supporter some day when I’m feeling less of the “your generation gets massive school debt and tiny salaries” pinch. Until then, cheers & thanks, and I tell people about the blog a lot so here’s hoping that helps.

    Reply
  3. mmcquown

    How about, “we wanted to make the costumes relatable to a modern audience.” Does it never occur to these shitheads that people might be going to see historical movies because they know something about history?

    Reply
    • Shashwat

      Relatability is a concept that is hard,and unnecessary,to apply to history.If movies can become relatable by dressing the cast in denim,then Henry viii should be depicted stalking Anne on instagram.But no,the productions decide to mess up with the costumes at the stake of our aesthetic sanity.

      Reply
      • nesseire

        You have a good point here. One of the things that make me go all ballistic is the “relatable for the modern audiences” crap. I´m looking at the last Little Women as the most recent example.
        How wonderful would it be to adapt that story to modern times? It have been done before with other classics (look at Lizzy Bennet diaries, in youtube). That way you can put all the relatableness you want! But no, it SHOULD be a “modern take of a classic story” screams internally

        Reply
    • Nzie

      By tying the relatability so closely to the clothes and hair instead of relying on strong storytelling and performances they’re making it more likely that there will be a shelf life to their work, as those choices are often very tied into the current look, which also has a shelf life. If they want to do it modern, then do it that way! Happens to Shakespeare all the time—he’s been transplanted to many eras and settings successfully because he was a master storyteller. But if you’re all about a historical setting and then don’t care about getting that right, well, that’s not going to work as well.

      Reply
  4. Alexander Sanderson

    Hi there! As a Patreon subscriber myself I have to say that people complaining about you providing exclusive content for your patrons really bugs me. You all do an amazing job and work really hard; providing entertainment, excellent research and a forum for all of us who love historical costume flicks… so there is much irritation when people seem to begrudge a small sum (at our discretion!) in support of the fabulous work you do. Come on people! The Frock Flicks Team deserves a little help in covering their costs, for heavens sake!

    Reply
    • Trystan L. Bass

      Thanks!!!! I really mean it when I feel bad we don’t post more on Patreon — I always worry ‘is this one good enough? is it long enough, are there enough photos?’ I don’t want to skimp for subscribers <3

      Reply
      • Alexander Sanderson

        Never fear – I have seen no skimping on any post, they are amazing and the content rocks! The MAS*H post was absolutely fantastic and the one on Lillie was superb… but it is really hard to pick certain posts out, as I have to say that all of the articles are top notch and to a fabulous standard! Thank you so much for your hard work and dedication, I am really, really glad that I subscribed!

        Reply
    • M.E. Lawrence

      Especially given the number of sites with rather more funding (the New York Times comes to mind) who keep reminding one that one has looked at one’s last article for the month. Or the sites that won’t let you on at all without cash up front. As for the swearing, ONE SOMETIMES NEEDS TO SWEAR. It’s a civilized alternative to smacking people upside the head.

      Next week on Paperwork Monday I’m increasing my subscription a bit so that FF gets as much as the Guardian. We need diversion more than ever these days.

      Reply
  5. Shashwat

    Regarding the swearing,even Disney made us face Maleficent and her powers of the “hell” and Claude Frollo cursed us with eternal damnation.If only these two could have delivered the judgement on the brains behind the costumes that would make a man want to stab his eyes.

    Reply
  6. MoHub

    I hate the posts in which someone complains about how “mean” you are. The sarcasm and bitchiness are what make Frock Flicks entertaining in addition to being educational. If these posters want nicey-nice critiques, they need to go elsewhere.

    Reply
  7. Pixel Pixie

    I swear a lot. I wear it as a mark of pride when my male friends say they’ve never met a woman who curses as much as I do. It does not detract from eloquence or intellectual discourse; I would argue they enhance a conversation.

    I do not understand people who find the words “fuck” or “shit” inherently offensive; why? Do you find the words “feces” and “coitus” offensive too? Offensive words are racial, homophobic, sexist, transphobic, etc, etc, etc slurs.

    Reply
    • Gentleman Jack

      Yes, exactly! Which is why I cringed when she used the term “fucktard,” since that’s derived from an ableist slur. It’s the second half of that word that’s the problem, not the first half.

      Reply
  8. Kate D

    Frock Flicks has been a highlight of my life for years. I love you ladies, love your humor, love your work. I laugh and I learn and I read every post. I’m happy to be able to be a Patreon subscriber as a small token of my appreciation for all you do.

    Reply
  9. Rachel morgan

    If you’re trying to track down a specific film, ask your local librarian! As a (former) reference librarian, I loved trying to find esoteric movies for my patrons!

    Reply
  10. Bonnie-Lynn N

    Long live the snark! I belong to some other groups and my pet peeve? People posting a picture of their book or books on the subject. Congratulations you bought a book! Wow you must really be interested in this. And how did you find this amazing book? They are so rare.

    Reply

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