20 thoughts on “SNARK WEEK: Bad Redheads in Historical Costume Movies

  1. Awww, but Giselle’s cupcake dress is so ridiculous it’s fun! But then I’m biased. :)

  2. I love Giselle’s ginormous dress in Enchanted! It works so perfectly for her character and is hilariously awful in the best possible way.

    And I don’t know what Hook you were watching because the Hook I know is an AMAZING movie and a beloved childhood classic. I mean obviously you have to ignore Julia Roberts because she is awful in it, but can we discuss Dustin Hoffman and Bob Hoskins as Captain Hook and Smee? BRILLIANCE.

  3. But have you seen the 1944 technicolor “Frenchman’s Creek”, Joan Fontaine as a glorious redhead in Restoration clothes (also dressed as a cabin boy) Basil Rathbone at his sneering best. Petticoat breeches and giant shoe roses on the gents. But not on the sexy pirate. I love it.

  4. One of the cosplayers I used to hang out with owns a coat made for Cutthroat Island, I got to see it very up close and personal (as in I inspected it very closely) amazingly well made garment…too bad the movie sucked so much.

    1. I’m pretty sure I saw every single pirate movie made in the 1980s, in the theaters, during the 1980s. Some multiple times. Yes, including “The Pirate Movie.” They all sucked so very much. I knew it back then, but I kept doing it. Some kind of compulsion or disease. I can’t explain it.

  5. OKAY, now that I’m finally on a laptop and can really type, MY (partial) REBUTTAL:

    1) You can never pick on Maureen O’Hara as she is partially responsible for “The Parent Trap,” one of the best movies of all time (the original, anyway).

    2) I concede Jane Asher. That pic gives me the fear.

    3) I may be a committed redhead, but I’ve never really loved Lucille Ball. Point conceded.

    4) Princess Joanna — IT’S BILL & TED! Plus, that crimping ROCKS. Remind me to tell you about how I crimped my hair for my first ever real concert, Motley Crue, Poison, and Whitesnake.

    5) NO MORE JULIA ROBERTS. I GIVE! I GIVE! UNCLE!

    6) Daw, but, Geena Davis!!

    7) Dr. Quinn, Medicine Boring. I concede.

    8) NOW YOU HAVE JUST LOST YOUR OWN ARGUMENT. KATE WINSLET IS THE BEST PART OF “TITANIC,” AND HER HAIR IS THE BESTEST BEST PART.

    9) Jessica Chastain — Sarah Plain & Tall?

    10) Amy Adams — as others have pointed out, a) it’s fantasy, and b) that dress rocks, and c) her hair rocks.

    11) Downton Abbey maids are a wash, because Gwen was great, but Ethel was annoying.

    12) Isla Fisher — she is hilarious and fabulous. Her clothes in The Great Gatsby, however, were tragic.

    1. I was still using my crimper until my hair fell out but even I didn’t do it w/a historical costume! And I do a lot of weird gothy shit with costumes.

      You can’t deny your own diss of Titanic. It’s on the record.

      Enchanted is in there bec. it’s redonkulously YOU. And it’s not even good fantasy — totally prom/quincenara, they bought it in one of the LA Garment District side streets.

  6. If I didn’t love you already, Trystan (which I did, um, do. Grammar police are coming for me), the fact that you used the term “clown realness” makes me your willing slave FOREVER.
    Plus I agree about Amy Adams’ quinceanera gown: miles of shimmering, flammable poly organza look like they’re right off the rack. That’s a costumer designer doing no more than placing an order here: http://www.morilee.com/quinceanera/quinceanera_vizcaya. Oh the shame of it! Although there is one buttercup yellow number that would make an awesome Belle from Beauty & Beast costume…

    1. Dawww, of course I had to point out the Bianca Del Rio vibe there, amirite???

      And I loves me some quinceanera gowns, but let’s just be honest about it. Thank you!

  7. Not to be the skunk at the costume party, but it should be pointed out that ENCHANTED was meant as a deliberate sendup of Disney’s own back catalogue of “princess” movies. Therefore, Amy Adams’ gowns were meant to be an exaggerated version of the stuff Cinderella, Aurora, Ariel etc. wore in their films (which explains why the dress was so big and poufy it needed its own zip code). Parody is intentionally ridiculous, so it may not be fair to criticize it. (And don’t give me that “there is no fairness in Snark Week” business; life and the universe may not be capable of fairness, but human beings are, and have a moral obligation to be fair when they can.)

  8. Well, I guess, in this film Amy Adams is technically a strawberry blonde, but, what about Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day? What a creation cast!

  9. Re Mame.
    It begins just before the Crash of ’29, so by the time Mame appears in this Number it’s at least late ’30s.

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