Michael Fassbender is a hottie, but I mostly associate him with contemporary film. So color me shocked when I went and looked and found that he’s actually been in a TON of historical films! Let’s appreciate this tall, auburn-haired drink of something very, VERY hot, shall we?
Band of Brothers (2001)
Still haven’t seen it, despite so many actors of hotness in it.
Look, baby Fassbender!
A Bear Named Winnie (2004)
I have no idea what this is about, but in my mind it’s about Winnie the Pooh (it quite possibly is). It’s set during World War II, and Fassbender is buddies with a bear. Named Winnie.
I love a man in uniform!
Behind the scenes, FASSBENDER BOTTLE FEEDS A BEAR. I CAN DIE HAPPY NOW.
A Most Mysterious Murder: The Case of Charles Bravo (2004)
I’m unclear on this one too, and sadly this picture is fuzzy, but who cares because Fassbender + White Tie. Also, this man can rock the mutton chops like few can.
HELLO SAILOR
Gunpowder, Treason & Plot (2004)
The fact this film’s title doesn’t use the serial comma is the least of its problems. Floating ruffs, shitty hair, and homophobia run rampant through this historically inaccurate tale of Mary, Queen of Scots and James I. Apparently Fassbender was in it. It was too long ago for me to remember!
I feel like wackiness may be ensuing here.
Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Silk Stocking (2004)
First of all, Rupert Everett plays Sherlock fans self. Second, I’m not sure if Fassbender plays the baddie or just someone who’s cocky, but YES PLEASE.
WHY YES I WOULD LOVE TO SHARE YOUR CHAMPAGNE
Poirot: After the Funeral (2005)
Baddie? Rakish? Jerky? Not sure, but it’s hot.
Look at that smirk! I love a guy who can smirk well.
300 (2006)
Shockingly, I have seen this. It’s not my usual cup of tea, but if you’re going to get Gerard Butler to run around shirtless, I’m in. Fassbender shirtless just adds to the appeal. I don’t care if half of the muscles are done with makeup and SFX. I’m just going to sit here and appreciate all the hotties in vaguely bondage-y leather speedos.
MY SWORD IS A METAPHOR
Let the wind ruffle your locks, Michael.
HA! But, yum.
Angel (2007)
This might be one of the shittiest movies around, despite starring Fassbender and Romola Garai. I have no idea what went wrong. My guess is the scriptwriter was someone’s grandson/daughter and so no one could tell them the script sucked?
And the clothes are pretty, too!
This looks so promising, doesn’t it?
Don’t be fooled. It’s TERRIBLE.
The Devil’s Whore (2008)
Fassbender joins Andrea Riseborough and Dominic West in this fictional tale set during the English Civil War. Fassbender plays a roundhead (i.e., Team Cromwell, anti-Team King), and he and Riseborough do some lovely shagging in between excellent mid-17th century gowns and battles. Highly recommended.
Long hair + pointy goatee = YES YES YES
Poor Andrea. Too many hotties to juggle!
I think I just ovulated.
Yep, that was definitely an egg!
Inglorious Basterds (2009)
I’d kind of like to have seen this, but I don’t actually want to see it. Get me? Nonetheless, Fassbender in Nazi military uniform = a Very Good Thing.
The whole Nazi thing was beyond horrible, except you have to admit they had great uniforms.
I’m not excusing anything Nazi, I’m just appreciating Fassbender.
Centurion (2010)
I’m unclear as to who thought this was a good idea, and the fur-pelt-shirt doesn’t excite me, but at least Fassbender partially gets his kit off. Thank you baby jesus!
I guess?
I wish it were under happier circumstances!
Clearly Photoshopped, but I don’t care: LOOK AT THOSE EYES.
Jonah Hex (2010)
An “American post-Civil War science-fiction Western film loosely based on the DC Comics character of the same name,” per Wikipedia. I’m sure there’s a perfectly legit reason for the tattoos.
Jaunty + tattoos + bowler = ??
Alright alright, if you’re gonna give me that smile I’m sold.
Jane Eyre (2011)
Fassbender as Mr. Rochester: EXCELLENT casting. Also, lovely costumes.
OH GOD. TOO HOT. CAN’T HANDLE IT.
And he has FEELINGS TOO. GAAAAAAH!
12 Years a Slave (2011)
Fassbender plays a screwed up, horrible slave owner in this film. The saving grace is it’s LOVELY to see his beard grown in so red!
That is a gorgeous beard, my friends.
No excuse for owning slaves, and for treating them horribly.
A Dangerous Method (2011)
Keira Knightley as a person with mental health issues who has a lot of sex — I just can’t. Nonetheless, I am impressed at how well Fassbender cleans up.
YES YES ANALYZE ME
Daw, I love a guy who can rock a good cardigan!
Sharp dressed men, phew!
Slow West (2011)
I only caught the end of this (the husband was watching it, and I wandered into the room), but it looked pretty good if you’re into arty.
I’d prefer it if he took a bath, but I can work around it.
Macbeth (2015)
Still haven’t seen this recent Shakespeare adaptation. Someone please tell me there’s a sex scene between Fassbender and Marion Cotillard?
He can be king of my kingdom!
Good lord.
Go get manly if you need to, honey. Just come back home to me.
Coming Soon: Assassin’s Creed
Hopefully it won’t all be dirty boys and battles? Oh, who am I kidding.
Someone tell me if he takes his shirt off.
Coming Soon: The Light Between Oceans
Fassbender and Alicia Vikander play an Australian couple who rescue a baby they find stranded and raise her. It’s set sometime mid-20th century and looks pretty heartbreaking from the trailer. Also, Rachel Weisz, which is a good thing!
Sweet!
What’s your favorite Michael Fassbender film?
Inglorious Bastards is how I discovered Mr. Fassbender. It’s one of those spaghetti westerns where history is altered for the story line so it’s pretty good. And he’s actually a British spy playing a Nazi so he’s really one of the good guys! Give it a chance because I think you’d like it. Plus, Brad Pitt plays a moonshiner with a thirst for scalping Nazis.
The Light between Oceans: maybe the dingo didn’t eat your baby?
Oh thank you, thank you, thank you for this!
I, ahem, appreciate a lot of celebrity men, but Fassbender has been #1 for me for a few now. In fact, I usually avoid going to see movies in theater because I have crowd issues, but his name in the credits will lure me to a cinema every damn time. I’m even psyched for that Assassin’s Creed movie, which I would have no interest in otherwise!
As for my favorite Fassbender movie, it really wouldn’t work for this post because prison movies set in the 80s don’t give you many costumes to work with, but his work in Hunger is absolutely stunning. And also super depressing and kind of traumatizing. :/
P.S. There is a brief sex scene in the Macbeth movie! :)
Another favorite Fassbender film, though also not a costume movie: Frank. It’s a comedy that manages to be hilarious, heartbreaking, and heartwarming all at once.
Sorry, totally distracted by the mention of Rachel Weisz roooowwwwrrrrrrrrrrr
The two lower pics from Sherlock are actually from Agatha Christie’s Poirot: After the funeral (2005).
Thanks!
☺️
I came here to say the same! I know my Poirot…
God, you ladies are so easy! Just a little muscle, some talent, a bit of dashing good looks and you’re all over the place. What maketh the world go ’round. First time I saw Fassbender was in the miniseries, “Hex,” where he played a demon, albeit a well-dressed one. It was a strange piece, with a ghost who wouldn’t stop eating, among other things. Mr F has also appeared as himself on the Graham Norton Show, which is a great place to see the people you like being funny without a script.
**agitatedly fans self** Is it getting hot in here?
Looks like His Batchness and The Hiddles have some competition for my affections now. Oh who am I kidding? I have enough to go around. Welcome to my harem, Mr. Fassbender!
His movie with the bear is indeed about the inspiration for Winnie the Pooh. It’s a very moving and heart-wrenching film. I can’t tell you WHY, but it made me cry. Twice.
I can totally imagine crying at that!
I love Fassbender, he’s one of my favorite actors et not just because he’s hot as hell ! I loved him in Inglourious Basterds, in Jane Eyre, in Shame and in many other movies. But my favorite performance, it’s Macbeth, he looks possessed by this role. The movie is slow but his acting is so magnificent it doesn’t matter.
I’d like to say Band of Brothers, but I’d be lying. My *fans self* favourite ginger in that was Damian Lewis as Richard Winters, a man who was so unassuming that his report of Brecourt Manor Assault was very self-deprecating which lost him the Medal of Honour, which IMHO he should have received.
So my favourite Fassbinder role is the upcoming The Light Between the Ocean and 12 Years a Slave.
Honestly there’s a lot more to Assassin’s Creed than fighting and battles. The games have a lot of history in them (once you finish the training/fetch-quest missions), but to tell the truth the costumes aren’t all that accurate. I love the series, but that just pains me.
What about the xmen movies? The 1960’s and 70’s may not always have been pretty but they are period.
I’ll dabble in the 1960s, but usually it’s too late for us on this site! If one of us was alive, then nyet.
So one of you was in the cradle during the 1960s, I bet you were colour coordinated and fashionable.
For comic relief, has anyone thought of reviewing Bill & Ted’s (Most) Excellent Adventure. Both Joan of Arc’s and the Tudor wenches were at least as accurate as Reign or The Tudors.?.
I’m trying to think of a movie that was worse than Angel. Gerard Butler’s Beowulf and Grendel, maybe.
Thank you for telling me that there is a movie where Fassbender bottle feeds a baby bear.
*sigh* I would wear that man like a scrunchie.
ANGEL. SO BAD. TESTIFY!
I couldn’t even finish it. I’d almost turned it off five times, but the final straw was the part where he had returned crippled from war and wanted to have sex and she was all ‘We shouldn’t! Your leg injury obviously affects your junk!”
Oh god! I blocked that out! Clearly I need to rewatch it for Snark Week…
It would be all about 2011 for me…a great year for him, with Jane Eyre, A Dangerous Method (I could have done without Kiera and her overactive flailing about, but with the dashing Michael as Jung and the perhaps more dashing Viggo Mortensen as Freud, my eyes were not displeased!), Shame (not really worth the guilty wallowing for me, as the gratuitous nudity didn’t balance out the incestuous creepiness) and, of course, X-Men: First Class, which would be worth any super hero silliness, if just for the behind the scenes dancing! [youtube=https://youtube.com/#/watch?v=XvEHxne2m1U]
Jane Eyre is the only movie I’ve ever watched and then immediately watched again after the credits. Fassbender really captured the intense brooding of Mr. Rochester, and I couldn’t wait to watch it again with the commentary.
Yep, there is sex scene it Macbeth. One coitus and one handy-wanky.
But I think the choice of WHEN those happens is VERY STRANGE.
The director had a very couple of strange choices throughout the movie, but it’s a gorgeous looking thing nevertheless.
Also watch with subtitles. Shakespeare is even denser when the actors are pure scots. I saw it with 2 brits in the cinema with no subtitles, and apparently they also had a hard time.
Jonah Hex–all I can think of is: tattooed-on neckbeard!
The baby-faced Fassbender in Band of Brothers immediately made me think of baby-faced McAvoy in ‘Lorna Doone’! Is it crazy how much I now associate them with one another?
It’s like Hiddleston/ Loki & Hemsworth/ Thor, Merlin & Arthur (Colin Morgan & Bradley James), & the senior X/ Stewart & Magneto/ McKellan – they feel very inseparable from one another… like all good bromances!