41 thoughts on “SNARK WEEK: All the Historical Costume Bitches

    1. I think Forman wanted to fluff it up because it is an extremely dreary morality tale. But it just comes across as a bunch of flighty people who take a joke too far. When really they were a bunch a holes, who enjoyed being a holes and messing with perfectly reasonable people for no reason at all.

  1. THIS IS WHY I LOVE YOU ALL SO HARD!
    And thank you for the special shout out to my girl Jane Austen. By most of my reading, she definitely was a mega-bitch, with a heart of gold!

    1. Thank god you paid tribute to Anna Chancellor. She’s my favorite historical-comedy-drama bitch of all time.

  2. Moll Flanders as played by Alex Kingston! She starts out kinda sweet, but not really, bec. you know she’s a bitch & the *bam* she becomes so very bad, so very bitchy! LOVE that version :)

  3. Livia as played by Sian Phillips in the BBC I Claudius is unbeatable. Lady Marchmain from the original TV series of Brideshead Revisited deserves and honourary mention. I don’t think Emma Thompson was so convincing in the film perhaps just because I like Emma too much to “buy” her being a super bitchy Mum.

  4. I didn’t see Rome so I have no opinion of these b*****, but I’m with you on the others. Especially Downton Abbey’s Lady Violet (love the pithy comments) and Lady Mary, I, Claudius’ Livia, and the Austen ones. Especially Anna Chancellor, Reese, Barbara Leigh-Hunt and Queen Cersei, oops, Lena Headey.
    But I also would include Sian’s Reverend Mother in Dune (1984) and Betty Davis as Margo Channing in ‘All About Eve’.

    1. Omigosh, YES to both of those! Imogen Stubb’s Little Miss Lucy Steele: so sweet, so innocent, all the while knowingly twisting a knife through your heart. And Harriet Walter’s Fanny was so natural and flawless. I felt the portrayal in the 2008 version was a little forced.

  5. So many bitches to love — how can I possibly choose? Jane Austen’s are top of my list, naturally.

  6. Where is Livia (Sian Phillips) in I, Claudius? A mother and grandmother who does not hesitate to kill anyone who gets in her way. She is for me the empress of them all.

    1. Bec. Kendra is against old-school cool! But I’m not – I *LOVE* Livia & I, Claudius!!!! Baddest bitch of them all! The series is on Acorn & I plan to review it soon :)

  7. Best bitchin’ post on the internet.

    I love many of these bitches, but my absolute favorite from this list is Catherine de Medici. She’s the ONLY reason I keep watching (and bitching about) the crap-fest that is REIGN. There are literally entire videos on YouTube just full of her insults, one-liners, zingers, and general bitchiness that I watch on occasion, just to glory in the pure snark.

    Ahh, something to aspire to.

    1. It is for her that I tried to watch Reign. But even with Megan Followes’ sublime bitchiness I just couldn’t. Which makes me sad, I wish I could keep watching it for her!

  8. As much as I adore the well-costumed bitches (and I DO), one of my favorites will always be Eva Green as Morgan le Fay in Camelot. The show was genuinely terrible (and the costuming somehow was even worse) but I still watched every episode so I could see her plotting in bathtubs and then swanning about in some ridiculous Renfest wear. Like Charity above and Catherine de Medici, she made the experience worth it, and it’s a shame that I didn’t get the chance to see her achieve proper victory.

  9. I would nominate the character of Countess Mahaut d’Artois as portrayed in the twice filmed French mini-series, Les Rois Maudits, (The Accursed Kings). She was played by Helene Duc in the 1972 version, and by Jeanne Moreau in the 2005. Like Livia in I Claudius, not a woman to get on the wrong side of.

  10. Excellent post! Movie bitches, I mean ladies, can sure be scary yet alluring. (Almost sympathise with the Frank Kennedys and the John Dashwoods…)

  11. Just because I soo want to see the wonderful costume fest, The Pallisers, (BBC 1972) reviewed here I will add Lady Laura Standish played by Anna Massey who was also a wonderfully sinister Mrs Danvers in the Joanna David version of Rebecca.

  12. I love this post! I took an Austen course in undergrad and my class took to exclaiming “Dang, Jane!” and “Tell us how you really feel, Jane!” at all her bitchiest authorial asides.

  13. A shout out for Jessica Lange in Cousin Bette! She’s slow to get going but when she goes into high gear, she takes them all down at once. :-)

    Atia in Rome was definitely a lethal bitch- don’t cross that one. :-)

  14. Love this post and totally agree Anna Chancellor is a snark queen. Have you seen the original Wicked Lady film from 1945 with Margaret Lockwood? She is just irredeemably awful and wears the most ridiculous though rather pretty costumes. Also it has James Mason in it as a highwayman who is just a total hottie!

  15. Your mention of Vivian Leigh’s Scarlett O’Hara reminded me of Bette Davis’ Julie Marsden in “JEZEBEL”. Naturally, both actresses won Oscars. I realize that you’re not a fan of the ABC miniseries, “NORTH AND SOUTH”, but I had to add Terri Garber as South Carolina belle, Ashton Main.

    And there is, of course, Jean Hagen as Lina Lamont in “SINGIN IN THE RAIN”.

  16. Have to endorse the vote for Livia from I Claudius – look forward to your review of that. I have a soft spot for Edna May Oliver’s Lady Catherine from the old movie of Pride & Prejudice – although they completely fudged the ending – she was great fun earlier in the movie.

  17. You forgot to mention Livia from “I Claudius”. I’m in shock …

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